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If You Want to Be Loved, Stop Ignoring His Taxi Light

You invested so much time and effort into him. You put your heart out there just one more time because you thought this was “different”, that he was “different”. But once again, your expectations weren’t met and you can’t help feeling like he left because you just weren’t worth staying around for. 

It breaks you. Of course, it does, there’s only so many bruises your heart can take before you start to feel like damaged goods. You feel so stupid to think that your beaten up heart was actually worthy of his love. And you critique yourself in every way because it’s your fault he “passed up” on you. 

It’s hard to swallow this feeling of rejection. But it’s a little easier to do when you start to think of men as taxis and this heart-wrenching cycle as the taxi light theory. 

A taxi light is either on or off, it’s either willing to take you somewhere or it’s not. There’s no in between and it’s not ever personal. You take it for what it is, and you look for cabs with their lights on. You don’t waste your time trying to get a lightless cab to go on any journey with you. 

It’s that simple, but it’s also not that simple. You can think of a guy as a taxi and their taxi light as an indication if they are open to the possibility of going somewhere with you or not. If they are ready to be in a relationship their light is on, and if they aren’t their light is off. No guy is going to go an extra mile with you if he doesn’t want to. 

It gets a bit complicated though because sometimes we get caught up in seeing the potential of something great with a guy that we don’t even pay attention to their taxi light. Instead, we look everywhere else for any sort of inclination that this could go somewhere. We look at their 2am texts asking “U up?” as a reassurance that we’re still a thought to them. We think about all the time and effort we put into it as a reason why this is worth fighting for. We straight out settle for staying in the same place with them rather than moving on without them. 

We’re not wrong for doing this. We have hearts that want to be loved and want to give love, so how could we be blamed for trying to make it work and seeing the good in someone? We can’t. But we also can’t keep blaming a guy for passing up on us because we weren’t worthy. 

He didn’t pass up on you because he thinks your heart is too damaged to love. He’s not being distant because you’re being clingy. And he didn’t reject you simply because he never thought of this as a relationship opportunity. His taxi light was never on, not for you or anyone else. He wasn’t looking for someone to go the distance with. 

It’s not personal and has nothing to do with you. It just tends to feel personal because we ignore their most obvious signal of intentions and think that if we try our hardest we can get them to move and when they don’t, we blame ourselves. 

Your heart is worthy of love. If you’re ready to go the long haul with someone then start looking for the right signals rather than overthinking all the wrong ones.