A solid hook-up buddy can be one of the best people in your life at a certain point. The ideal friend with benefits is one who treats you like a friend, but instead of high-fiving when you both get excited about something they will sleep with you. Once feelings catch, problems arise, but I have found a great way to ensure that both parties know that they are nothing more than each others FWB: clever nicknames.
Just because you aren’t dating doesn’t mean you can’t call your hook-up buddy a fun nickname. Notice that I said “fun” nickname and not “nauseating” nickname. Believe it or not, there is a difference. Want to find a nickname for your FWB that does not sound like something a legitimate couple would call each other? Take a look at some of these ideas.
- F*** Buddy: This one is a classic. The f-word makes it clear that you are not considering the sex you have with your FWB an emotional experience. The word “buddy” reminds you both that you’re just that: buddies, friends, pals. This is short, sweet, and you get to swear. Who doesn’t love a nickname like that?
- Gym Buddy: This is sarcastic because who actually enjoys going to the gym? Exactly. It works though because you and your FWB aren’t necessarily being lazy when you’re together- unless you had a really long day at work and decide to just dead fish it for one night. If your friends ask where you’re going and you don’t want to tell them, just say you are going to do a quick cardio session with your gym buddy.
- BFF: They obviously aren’t your best friend forever (if they are then why the hell are you dating already?) which makes this a nickname rather than a legitmate label. Why call them your best friend, then? Because they mix friendship with making out, and that is a pretty solid deal. Plus, the additional “F” clarifies that they aren’t your boyfriend.
- Bed Buddy: Since your bedtime activities are now incorporated into the friendship, bed buddy is a great way to remind people that you are getting laid by somebody who you truly tolerate. Plus, alliteration always makes nicknames sound like fun.
- Your “Uh…Um…Er…Friend: “This is what you should call your hook-up buddy if you accidentally run into them while you are grocery shopping with your Mom. She’ll totally get the point if you hesitate, but you’ve gotta at least try to be discrete.
- Slam Piece: Because nothing says “NOT REALTIONSHIP READY” better than calling somebody your slam piece. You will send the message loud and clear with this nickname.
In short, anything that stresses you are not dating each other or a nickname that ends with the word “buddy/friend/pal/amigo” will suffice as a solid nickname for your FWB. Have any nicknames we missed? Comment below.