20 Realities of the Girl Who's Not, and Never Will Be, a Morning Person

There are some who wake up seeing the sun, and then are are the people who wake up seeing red. People who always wake up in a sh*tty mood, understand the struggle of staying awake and trying not to punch everyone around you in the face at the same time.

  1. Most of the shade you throw is thrown in the morning. 

  2. You have the hardest time waking up. 

  3. It doesn’t matter how much sleep you get, you always hit the snooze button before turning your back on your alarm clock.

  4. Which explains why you’re doomed to a lifetime of being late to work.

  5. Or anything else that requires you to get up in the morning.

  6. You’re always underestimating time, thinking you could make it to the train station within thirty minutes when you end up getting there an hour later.

  7. And now you’re even more grumpy because you’re going to be late…again.

  8. You want to punch people who greet you in the morning in the teeth.

  9. But you’d never actually do it because that would require a lot of energy that you just don't have this early.

  10. Morning interviews are the worst because you can’t be an a** to the recruiters.

  11. Which is why you have a whole system on how to be awake and sane at the interview.

  12. The bags under your eyes are permanently present, and even more so before you've had coffee. 

  13. Which is why you wish you had a disclaimer to warn people that they shouldn’t talk to you before you slurp down your caffeinated eye-opener. 

  14. As much as you tell yourself you’ll drink it less in order to be healthier, you realize you need it if you’re going to survive.

  15. You’ve internally screamed at roommates who are loud as f*ck in the morning. 

  16. And stared daggers at anyone who’s cheery in the morning.

  17. Because really, you’re jealous of them for being able to smile before 12pm.

  18. When you wake up from a nap, you're more or less in a comatose state, draped in a blanket with one thing in mind—food.

  19. You plan to wake up feeling fresh and happy but something always ruins that.

  20. …like your alarm clock.

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