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I'd Rather Be Single Forever, Than Date Your Cheating A** Again

I would rather remain single than be with someone who can't be loyal. 

I would rather fall asleep on my own pillow and experience this life by myself than be thinking about you are going to lie to me and go from vagina to vagina. You see I am not a Tinder kind of lover. I am not someone who wants to come back to someone who has text messages filled with other females and lies about flirtatious messages they send.

I should have to deal with that crap. I shouldn't have to doubt your loyalty or wonder where you are going, or if you are still actively using other dating apps. The thing is I am worth more than the excuses and the lies. I am more than the swipe rights while we are dating –  I am more than your urges to not remain focused on just me.

I am worth more than the late nights, and the worrisome gut-wrenching feeling I've felt when you don't get back to me for long period of times. There is no use putting up with the guy whose eyes wander. The guy who hides everything and thinks I don't know.

I don't need to go back to someone who never follows through, who makes me feel like everything is my fault – and that is what caused you to leave. See I know I deserve to not feel lost. I know I deserve someone who will be around more than once. 

I would rather sit lonely, and eat pizza and have a good time then constantly make my world revolve around someone who never wants to send a text – unless it is on their time. I am tired of feeling lost. I am tired of the confusion  – and the feeling of loss. 

I deserve someone who won't be closed off. Who will be reasonable and honest. I deserve a partner who won't leave me at the end of the day. Because really I don't you. I don't need you nor do I want you.

I don't want you when you have in the past undermined my pain. I don't want you because you slept with others time and time again. I don't want you because I know at the end of the say this life is better is without you. 

You grew comfortable cheating on me and made me feel like I had done something wrong to make you fall in love with infidelity. But the thing is you are the one who is not good enough…

You are the one who is in the wrong.  I didn't deserve any of it. 

And being treated like crap taught me something. It taught me to move past that treatment and see myself for who it is I am. And that is being someone without you in it. No one deserves what you've put me through. 

So I'm going to stay single now – because I deserve more than you realize. I don't deserve to feel like a burden for something you have done. 

I would rather be single than deal with you again. 

I've got self-esteem to think about. I've got a better future to think about. 

And I would rather be single than date a cheating punk again. I've got better things to do, and better people to surround myself with. 

To see more from Amina, visit her here.