I can't seem to escape you

I can’t escape you.  

I don’t know how to not think about you.

I don’t know how to not miss you.

I try not talk about you,

But your name seems to always escape my lips.

I have so many questions.  

Do you miss me?

Why did you leave me here to hurt?

Who do you think you are?

Why weren’t you who you swore you’d be?

Why don’t you care?

Did you ever really care?  

Were you pretending to love me?

I want these questions answered.

I need them answered.

I can’t get you out of my head.  

I’ve never been this messed up over a guy before.

I can’t stop thinking about you.

I drink the pain away,

But that’s only a temporary fix.

I make everyone believe that I’m happy to be rid of you.

That  I don’t miss you.

But the truth is…

I long to hear your voice,

To see your captivating smile,

To be in your protective, safe arms again.

Knowing that day will never come makes my heart ache.

I just need to learn how to not love you.