Honestly, fuck you. I really don’t get it and maybe I never will, but you ended up to be one giant disappointment. You just disappeared with no explanation, for no reason…at least no reason that you cared to share with me.
We were the two girls who no one expected to be friends and yet we used to be so close. We beat the odds and stayed friends for longer than anyone expected, then suddenly, one day you were gone.
After sharing everything from clothes to heartaches, good times and bad, wasn’t I worthy of at least being told why you didn’t want to be my friend anymore?
We were inseparable. You knew me better than anyone in the world and vice versa (or so I thought). Words can’t properly convey this awful pain of suddenly losing a person you thought was your twin soul.
It fires me up that I trusted such a heartless person with my life. I would’ve been there for you through anything, but apparently I’m just disposable to you.
People still ask me about you all the time. What the actual fuck am I supposed to tell them, that I’m just as clueless about what’s going on with you as they are?
When they ask how you are, I have to admit that I don’t know because you left my life with no warning and never came back. Do you know how humiliating that is? To walk around and have people look at me with pity that I had a falling out with someone I thought would be my bridesmaid one day?
I feel sick to my stomach when I think about how much we’ve been through together and how easily it was for you to leave it all behind. You were the one person I could count on, but now you’re just somebody I used to know.
You left me shattered as you threw away all of our memories that can’t be erased, pictures that can’t be untaken, and inside jokes that can’t be untold.
I never imagined living without you by my side, facing life’s ups and downs together. I understand that we changed as we grew up, but why didn’t you have the balls to tell me you didn’t want to be friends?
You acted like the cowardly boys we used to hate, the ones who left us broken hearted with no explanation. It was so much worse, though, because friends are supposed to be more important.
I’ve made peace with this, I stopped reaching out a long time ago and my heart is starting to heal. And while I hope that you’re happy no matter what, your actions have shown me how messed up you really are.
I forgive you because I will always care, but just know, I’m holding both middle fingers high and saying a big fuck you.
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