5 Ways to Get Back in the Game After a Longterm Relationship

Healing from a breakup in one thing, but healing from a long-term relationship that didn’t end the way you thought it would is a million times worse. Because you’ve committed so much time and energy to this person who is now suddenly MIA from your life. It hurts worse than any regular breakup because this person was so ingrained in your life that now it seems like this empty feeling will never go away. But trust me, it will and when it does you’ll be so proud of yourself that you made it through this.  

1. Give yourself as much time as you need to heal and then love. 

Ending a long-term relationship usually means lots of long talks and talking about your emotions because this isn’t just any old fling. You are bonded on a deeper level than most, that’s why allowing yourself to grieve is so pivotal. And the worst you can do soon is to jump on the dating bandwagon even before the heart heals. 

Love is a gamble and it is better to take the time to grieve then recover and be well again before looking for love again. And once you’ve healed…

2. Remember love will find you… but only in the right places.

When feeling single and lonely, one mistake you can make is to visit the wrong places, hoping to get someone to love. As much as going out and drinking is a fun night, you’re not going to find your Mr. Perfect when he’s blackout on whiskey sours. There is no shame in slaying the dating app game if you have to, honestly it’s almost your best option.  And always remember to…

3. Love yourself for everything you are and have to offer.

There is not a single soul on this earth who wouldn’t vouch that being alone can really suck. But remember who you are, don’t lose sleep over the fact that you’re single. Live up the time you have walking around your apartment naked because you won’t always get these times. Love yourself for your too fat, too thin, weird, outgoing, chatty, sometimes clingy perfect self.  

Never hide your true self because it’s all part of the healing process: the sooner you accept and come to terms with everything that you are, the sooner you’ll be ready to find love again. And when you do cross paths with someone… 

4. Know your standards and stick by them (even if they’re sky high).

Hell if you want to make a pros and cons list about your next first date, do it. As long as you have a complete understanding of what you can somewhat tolerate for a guy with a good heart and what’s an absolute deal breaker, you’re setting yourself up for a win. 

Don’t throw away your old relationships and look at them as a waste of time. You might not realize it yet, but you learned about yourself. Those relationships taught you what you want and what you know you deserve in love so now when it comes to finding the real deal, you know exactly what to look for. But it’s always important to…

5. Let each date be just a date and let everything else fall into place.

Okay, the next guy you go out with probably won’t be Mr. Right. He might say things that make your heart race and when he walks into the room your stomach might fill with butterflies, but that doesn’t mean he’s it. Allow each date you go on to be just that: a date. 

Don’t take life so seriously, there is a path you’re on even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. Let yourself have fun and be yourself because when the right guy does come along, you’ll know with every bone in your body.