To My Drunk Alter Ego: Ten Things I Hate About You

Dear Drunk Self, 

You and I have this relationship that is the love/hate sort of thing. 

I hate you in the mornings when I’m the one nursing that hangover. 

I hate you for taking that shot and insisting on taking more. 

I hate you for thinking you were the richest person at the bar and buying everyone drinks. 

I hate you for going to the ATM, in a black out, and taking out more money than we agreed to.

I hate you for your dance moves. 

And the way you embarrassed me at the club.  

I hate it when you talk to everyone

Even the people you don’t like. 

I hate you in those times you do something insane. 

And for the times you drunkenly lie

Then you become that girl who’s always the one to cry

I hate you when hooked up with your ex 

I hate you for your drunk calls.

“But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you. 

Not even close. Not even a little bit. Not even at all.?? 

Because in reality there’s a confidence to you that I even I can’t shake. 

We seem to not give a fuck when we show up at any place.

Because I love you for the time, you cursed off the ex that hurt you. 

We both know I wouldn’t have done that. 

I love you for those moments that seem happy and full of bliss. 

Because we both know sober me wouldn’t act that carefree. 

I love how bold you are like the time you just went up and started kissing our crush. 

I love you even more for waking up next to him. 

I love how you manage to drink for free and can get anyone to buy you a beer. 

I love you for the honest things you say. Even though it’s not always clear.

We have this love-hate relationship that I can’t seem to deny

I claim to hate you but really it’s a lie. 

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