23 Things that Happen When You’ve Had the Same Phone Number For, Literally, Ever

Some people are notorious for changing their number every two months. You, on the other hand, have only had one number… like, ever:

  1. You receive text messages asking if this is still your number…
  2. Five years after not talking to someone.
  3. You have contacts saved in your phone from 2004.
  4. When old friends don’t know your phone number by heart…
  5. You’re legitimately offended.
  6. When getting a new SIM card, you’re sent into a slight state of panic…
  7. But I can keep my number right???????
  8. If you’re from NYC you’re “a 917”…
  9. Never 646, 347, or any other silly area code.
  10. You’ve drunk dialed your ex-ex-boyfriend’s sister’s best friend by accident.
  11. Sh*t. Just… sh*t.
  12. If you’ve spent a significant amount of time out of the country before…
  13. You’ve actually paid the fee to keep your number active.
  14. Because ain’t nobody gonna ever get your number.
  15. Sometimes you wish you didn’t have the same number you had when you were 13…
  16. Because some things are better left in your teenage years.
  17. But the thought of getting a new phone number is horrifying.
  18. People go through numbers like underwear…
  19. While you’ve been wearing the same pair for a decade.
  20. You have someone saved in your phone as DON’T PICK UP.
  21. That same number has been calling you for 7 years…
  22. Yelling in Spanish, asking for Maria.
  23. Honestly, Maria doesn’t even deserve your pity anymore.

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