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5 Ways To Make It Work In A Relationship When Your Partner Is Insecure

In society, people often perpetuate the stigma that insecure individuals are undatable because of their insecurities and problems. This could not be more false.

No one in the world is truly “undatable,” some people just come with a bit more baggage than others and it’s up to the people they choose to date to learn to cope with those suitcases. Some people find it incredibly difficult to date those with insecurities because they require a little extra TLC, a little more validation and sometimes, a bit more effort and time. But, I’ll be honest, if you’re dating someone who doesn’t want to give you any of those – why are you dating them anyway?

Being with someone who is insecure can be a challenge sometimes, there’s no denying that. But, in a way, from time to time we are all a bit insecure. There are times when we are comparing ourselves to others, times we wish we can change aspects of ourselves, times when are extra down on ourselves – which in turn, makes us all slightly insecure.

Being insecure to the point where you don’t love yourself, however, is a very big struggle to overcome – one which not many people do. And, being in love with someone who cannot love themselves is even harder, as many people feel that individuals show others how to love them by the way in which they love themselves.

There are ways in which to make your partner feel more secure and comfortable in your relationship, by doing big things and small things to show them that they do matter to you and they are worth it.

5. Remind them why you love them.

Some people who are insecure feel bad about certain aspects of themselves that others may enjoy. For example, your partner may think they’re not that good looking, or, they have an embarrassing quality or quirk. It’s important to remind them why you love them and what your favorite parts of them are. Sometimes, they may struggle to accept compliments because they don’t necessarily believe it about themselves, but, if you tell them enough times, hopefully, they’ll believe it, too.

4. Don’t give them a reason to doubt you.

If you want to date someone – date someone. If you’re unsure about someone, don’t date them. It’s bad enough to date someone you’re unsure of, to begin with, but if you’re dating someone you know struggles with self-worth and self-esteem and not entirely committed, you’re just being a complete douchebag. No one should have to lie awake at night and wonder if their significant other really wants to be with them. Make sure you’re sure before setting up any sort of commitments.

3. Respect their boundaries and limits.

Don’t push someone if they explain some things are harder for them – this goes for any relationship you’re in with any kind of person. Maybe they’re more comfortable having sex with the lights off. Maybe they’re not ready to go out with all of your friends and their girlfriends/boyfriends just yet. Whatever the issue is, let them get to it in their own time. Pushing them will only make it worse and is slightly disrespectful.

2. Realize you may need to work a little harder to earn their trust.

Insecure people have usually been burned before in the past by a relationship or ex. Realize that it’s not you, but things they are afraid of from their past that prevent them from opening up so easily. Don’t make them feel bad or take it as an insult, realize it’s not you and that even if you’re doing everything right, you may just have to put in that extra effort. If they’re worth it to you, then it’s worth doing.

1. Don’t throw their insecurities in their face.

The worst thing you can do to someone who is insecure and has low self-esteem is reminding them constantly, blame them or throw it in their face. That’s the worst possible thing to do because it’s like taking 10 steps back in any situation. It will be a bit more work to date someone who is insecure, but, realize that in the end, the more you try, the less insecure this person will be as they will grow to trust you, and love themselves a bit more along the way.