We've just found out that our other half, the center of our world, the person we thought we'd have forever betrayed us and has been hooking up with someone else.
Aside from the obvious questions “why?”, “who?”, “when?”, we are now also faced with the question, “Do I stay or do I go?”
Right now is the time to reflect on who we are as a person. We have to remember there is nothing that we did personally to have this happen.
Sometimes life happens, stress, busy schedules, a breakdown in communication. There isn't the same time for intimacy as there used to be.
"I wasn’t getting any"
The relationship has fallen into that “comfort” stage. When it gets to this point, both parties need to communicate with each other.
This is not a reason to step out and destroy a relationship. We have to be open with our feelings about the relationship, with any problems or concerns.
However, some people don't attempt to fix what they have. They just want the exciting feeling of the new relationship or new girl, which in turn hurts the person they love.
Should we stay?
If we ask friends or family, they will all tell us something different. Obviously, they are trying to help, but right now, we have to look inside and answer this question for ourselves.
If we're able to forgive them and believe that they won't do it again, then there's our answer.
However, if we think we will use this against them in every fight or argument from now on, then we should probably just leave now.
Forgiving them and trusting them but throwing it in their face every time something happens means we didn’t forgive them at all, really.
Should we go?
Starting over is obviously going to be a hard thing to do. You trusted another person with your heart and they broke it.
If we choose to leave, we have to accept that the choices they made were theirs to make, and we chose to walk away for our own happiness and well-being.
It will definitely hurt. We'll say we won't get involved with anyone ever again; we will cry, scream, and feel betrayed.
But, after a while (it may be days, weeks, months or more) we will start feeling like our old selves.
We will find ourselves not thinking about them as much, laughing a lot more, maybe even noticing new people around.
Life goes on.
Ultimately whether we stay or go is up to every one of us.
If we stay, some might call us crazy, or stupid, or blind. Our true friends will support us, though.
If we decide to save face and leave, that is also our choice.
Just know that regardless of the decision we make, this is our life- we know what makes us happy and what doesn’t.
We can't let anyone else tell us differently.