Anxiety

I’m a chronic plans canceler, there I said it, but that doesn’t make me a bad friend. My excitement when I originally made plans with you was genuine, it wasn’t fake. You’re my friend, and I love you, and it’s always exciting to spend time with you. I mean, nothing makes me happier than to enjoy a margarita, and a plate of nachos together. But what happened from the time we made the plans to when it was actually time to go is a battle I’m exhausted of fighting.

 

See, the moment I realize that tonight I have to leave the comfort zone of my house, my heart starts to beat a bit faster. I get this clammy feeling and I feel a little nauseous, but it has nothing to do with you. It’s all me and my head, believe me. I suffer from social anxiety, a condition triggered by social interaction that heightens… no… maximizes the anxiety in my body. I know it’s difficult to understand, because you’ve known me forever and we’ve spent countless nights together that you probably didn’t realize I was anxious, so let me explain.