From the minute I met you, I felt one of those deep connections you only hear about and don’t really believe exists until you actually experience it. The type of connection where you feel like both your souls are willing to jump into the other. I never truly felt anything like it before. The chemistry between us was just unreal and it immediately pulled me in with such a force, I felt my heart was going to come out of my chest. All I wanted at that moment was to really absorb it and process the effect that you were having on my heart and soul.
I saw a guy who seemed to have his life figured out, I saw a wise, mature man.
I felt like we were automatically on the same page and that feeling was extremely intoxicating and exciting. The feeling that someone you barely know just gets you. It was like I’d known you my whole life, and I wanted to know you forever.
You quickly became a constant in my life and I thought things were going really well. We talked all day, every day, for days on end. I thought there was a lot potential in this unique connection we had that seemed like it was quickly evolving into something truly special.
You shared so much of your life with me. You told me about your job, your family, your past. You even told me what you wanted for your future. You said that your mom would love me when she met me and that you’d love to take me around your hometown one day. It all sounded compelling except for the fact that you were conveniently forgetting to mention that you were in a serious relationship with some girl.
Imagine my surprise when I stumbled upon your facebook (okay, I was purposely looking for your facebook) and saw “In a relationship with _______”, I couldn’t have been more confused. I was definitely in denial at first, thinking maybe you broke up and never changed it back to “single”. But honey, your girlfriend’s social media is very much public and she is incredibly proud to show you off. If only she knew.
As much as I like you, and I wanna believe what we had was something real, your character has been completely diminished into a lying, cheating, bastard. And I refuse to settle for that, and for being someone’s second, or third or fourth option. I should have been your only option.
I haven’t confronted you about it because deep down I wanted to give you a chance to come clean, but I’ve been given you way too much time to do so and you haven’t yet and I know you never will.
It hurts that you still try to talk to me because every time you do I think of you deliberately hurting someone’s feelings. Even if she doesn’t know, your intentions speak volumes about how much of douchey person you are.
It blows my mind that you get upset with me for being short with you, well, who knows if that’s even true. The only one with legitimate rights to be upset is me. You lying prick!
Actually, the fact that you have the balls to get upset just really shows me how far your cynicism goes and I honestly don’t need that garbage in my life. What kind of a person tries to flip the truth around just so they can feel good about themselves? Well, you do...shocking!
I have so much anger inside but I still can’t bring myself to tell you that I know about your girlfriend. I just can’t find it in me to let that become a full reality. Part of it is that I don’t really want to deal with the drama of it all. And well, I also don’t want to tarnish the memory of feeling something so special even more.
For now, I’ll slowly let you go and let you think I lost interest, even though I know it’s the wrong thing to do, it’s the best I can do right now. It hurts like hell to have been fooled by you, after the way you quickly became so important to me. But I obviously never meant that much to you, and I think more of myself than to continue to not be your top priority, or even a priority at all.
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