The Squad does everything together, which is what makes spending time without each other the absolute hardest thing ever.
So someone gets desperate enough to pick a house that’s close to everyone and it all goes downhill from there.
- When you’re at home alone, you revert back to your potato-chip eating, Netflix binge-watching self #lonewolf
- Once you reunite, everyone falls back into the same roles: the leader, tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum, the “sensible one,” the one who’s bat-shit insane, etc.
- The Planning Stage is where the crazy starts: your phone will not stop going off with group texts and Facebook event invites.
- There’s always the one person that literally never responds, so you just assume they’ll show.
- No one ever knows who to hug first, so it turns into a giant pile of ridiculous 20-somethings.
- Everyone takes a selfie with everyone because were you really together if there isn’t photographic proof?
- Despite the fact that you’ve been communicating via Snapchat all summer, everyone needs to retell everything that happened in vivid detail.
- From that time in May when they tripped down the stairs to every single place they threw up on Fourth of July.
- You don’t leave on time. You don’t even end up at the right place.
- Any and all plans are quickly abandoned.
- Instead of going to the bar like you planned, you all end up laying in the front yard surrounded by empty beer cans...
- Undoubtedly disturbing the neighbors because you’re all screaming about how much you missed each other.
- The Leader tries to keep control of everyone, fails, gets shit-faced instead.
- Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum have wandered away. They are lost. No one knows where they are.
- The “Sensible One” is avoiding everyone by sipping a soda way in the back and making fun of you.
- The Bat-Shit Insane one is crying. No one knows why. No one ever knows why.
- You all end up sleeping on top of each other on the floor of the living room because you’re that drunk and The Squad is always ready for an impromptu cuddle sesh.
- If you manage to wake up the next morning, the kitchen of whoever’s house you’ve invaded becomes Ground Zero real quick.
- Just imagine how a kitchen might look after cooking breakfast for a small, ravenous army.
- Leaving doesn’t suck as much because, if you can manage to get The Squad together to get drunk, you can probably get them together for anything.
- Someone inevitably suggests that you probably don’t need to make a Facebook event next time.
- Next time comes: your phone is blowing up with Facebook invites. Right on cue.
Sign up for the Pucker Mob Women’s News Email Newsletter
powered by ArcaMax