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To the Guy Who Taught Me What I Deserve

I can’t let anyone in anymore. My walls are constantly up in fear that I’m going to be hurt again. You broke every piece of my heart without saying a single word. I think that’s where it hurt the most, you didn’t say anything you just left. You left me hanging out to dry, you left me standing alone, you left me remembering everything we had went through.

I remember everything with a particular fondness. I drive by all the places we went together and just stare into the distance. The memories all flood back and then I hear a car horn realizing someone is behind me. It breaks my trance, I’m back to reality.

Reality, a place where you’re no longer mine. Somedays I feel like I didn’t get enough of you, I didn’t have enough time to appreciate all of you. But the time I did have it all felt so simple and my heart was complete. Now everything is forced and I’m still managing to piece my heart back together.

I don’t want you back. Don’t try and take this as me saying that. I am way too far gone to be worried about anything we once had. You were like a sweet dream; it was a fairytale. I should have known that what we had would never last, it was too good to be true. Just like that you were gone.

Thank you.

Because of you I realized what I am worth. I’m worth being shown off. I’m worth being treated like a real girlfriend and not someone that’s on your side. I’m worth so much more than you made me out to be.

But you are NOT worthy of my love.

I tried to give you everything that I had. I wanted to be the one for you, but that wasn’t my place I suppose. For that I am grateful, I deserve far more than what you gave me. All I got out of us was a broken heart and a new perspective.

So thank you for hurting me, it was what I needed. Before you I had no idea, I was content with being treated completely wrong. You showed me so much that I needed to know. You may not be worthy of all my love, but there was a point in time that I needed you. You fulfilled your duties.

This is my forever goodbye.